Chapter 6

When Link had joined the family, the adjustment had been fast and simple. Barive's reunion presented itself to be more of a task. There was tension, because he wouldn't reveal his whereabouts over the past 10 years, other than to say that he'd been everywhere at one time or another. He avoided questions about why he'd been gone so long, and why he left in the first place. His children had grown up without him, all three, and their loyalty and love for him was questionable, but still there.
Kiana was strongly attached to her father. This was odd, to say the least, but she credited it to the fact that he had taken her in when he didn't have to, and that proved his love for her. Also, she looked on his reappearance as a chance to start fresh, with no mistakes.
Chezdon had become attached to Barive for the first 8 years of his life. There was no question that he looked on Barive as his father. But Chezdon had grown into manhood alone, and needed a male role model. Link had filled this role, before and after he had become a Dassin, and Chezdon found it tricky to look up to someone new. He was set in his ways, and standing on the verge of complete adulthood.
Link had never known Barive. Not in childhood, the teenage years, or his early adulthood. There were questions in Link's mind about whether or not Barive could actually love his firstborn son. Bid Barive blame him for his mother's death? Did he care that she was dead? Did he care that Link was alive? These doubts manifested themselves in Link's cold silence toward Barive. In the icy glares Barive recieved when he attempted to make conversation with Link. In the long hours Link spent lying awake at night, wondering...
Finally, Barive could stand no more of Link's attidtude. The last strw came when he said to his son, "Hi, Link." only to be answered by Link getting up and heading to the door. Barive got irritated.
"Boy, get back here and sit down! We will talk if it kills us both!" he snapped.
Link turned angrily to face his father. His fingers figited in the same way they had done so long ago when Zelda had confronted him about his intrest in the Dassins, but now he wasn't nervous. The ice was gone from his eyes, melted by flaming anger. "Don't call me 'boy'! My name is Link and I'm not a little boy!"
Barive didn't move. "Sit. Talk. Now." He said the words in a short, fatherly tone that wanted no argueing. Link stiffened in irritation, but sat. With his arms folded across his chest as he leaned back slightly in his chair, Link looked very much like a rebellious teenager about to get a lecture from his dad. The annoyed and angry look on his face completed the appearance.
"What do you want to talk about, Dad?" ha said the last word as though it were an insult.
"About you." said the older man, "And me. And why we don't get along."
Link sighed, a very frustrated sounding sigh. "Have this conversation with your other son. You're wasting my time. You could be bonding with Chezdon and Kiana right now."
There was a moment's silence while Barive stared at his son. Finally, he said, "Why do you hate me?"
Link opened his mouth to say that he didn't have Barive when he was struck with deja-vu. He remembered talking with Chezdon by the lake. He hadn't understood back then how betrayed Chezdon had felt. Betrayed by the man he called his father, the man who sat here now.
Choosing his words carefully, Link spoke slowly as he said, "I don't...hate you. Not exactly...I hate..." he was unsure of how to continue. What did he hate? "...what...you did to Mom...And to me."
Barive was puzzled, and Link saw it on his face. "What did I do? Link, what do you mean?"
Link was enraged. How dare he forget! Not even know! The anger exploded out of him in a barrage of ranting at Barive.
"You don't know? Why not? You leave Mom for dead, and not only do you marry again right away, you forget she existed! And you don't care that youronly son was lost with her, you just have another and forget your firstborn and the woman you were supposed to love forever! That's why I hate you, and I will til I die!" he turned to leave, but Barive called him back to his seat.
"Sit down, boy, and let me get your facts straight! You don't know what you're saying!"
"You deserted us both and never bothered to come find us! You just made yourself a brand new life and a new family, wihtout us!"
"They had to convince me with years of therapy that I didn't have a wife and son because they didn't think it was possible! They told me I was insane! I wasn't insane! They made me insane! They made me insane by telling me that the two things that meant more to me than life itself didn't exist!"
"And you beleived them! Do you still beleive that story? I exist! Mom existed! Why don't you beleive the truth? Why, when you can see it right here?"
"I never beleived them! Where do you think I was for 10 years? I'll tell you where. I was looking for you! I never gave up on you, even when I knew your mother had died. I looked! How did you expect me to find you? You had an airtight hiding place, where you physically couldn't be. I couldn't find you if I knew where you were!" Barive grabbed Link's shoulders and hissed through clenched teeth, "I never gave up on you for 21 years. Don't give up on me after a week."
The words hit Link like a solid blow to the face, or one to the stomach, for he couldn't find the air to breathe. Did Barive actually care about him? After all these years...Then why did he settle down with a new family, only to leave then in pursuit of his forst one? It didn't make sense.
"I...need some time to think." Link stammered. He pulled away from his father's grasp and bolted for the door and away. To where, he didn't know. But it would have to be someplace where no one could find him, unless they knew his soul inside and out.